Thursday, 16 July 2015

TARZAN..........Not quite!



TARZAN....not quite!  13 July 2015




It was  about 19.30, one minute I was happily working on pergola repairs under our wisteria walk then suddenly I was suspended by my left arm...feet only a couple of feet from the floor  but as I looked at said arm, it gave an unpleasant scrunching noise and changed direction!



Looking up I thought...this never happened to Tarzan!



Dropped to the ground quickly, arm not responding to any signals!  Found Ruth and explained we had to go to hospital pronto!!

Managed to get car out, while she was sorting dogs etc. and sat waiting. No pain yet, but I knew it would be coming.....15 years or so earlier, I dislocated my right arm or rather one of the heavy horses did it for me!!



Made it to Saumur quite quickly..... met nice nurse in admissions bit whose  grandmother lives in Varennes sur Loire and who we do actually know!



“What is the pain like?  Oh  7,  right here are a couple of paracetemol!!!”  

 The French do not like Ibuprofen which really works well for me!



After a couple of goes on intravenous morphine..... they jacked up the dose a trifle and pain level reached 10...speechless by now and it is 10pm.



OK,  x-ray is free now so off for a picture or two to reveal it was just a dislocation, although as the top of my arm was halfway down my ribcage, they had had their doubts!!



One beefy female doctor and two younger girls could not move it so heavy mob called in looking like two prop forwards and the gas man. I did explain to the lady doctor that the last time in UK the male doctor had put his foot on my chest to get sufficient leverage!! She was amused but said she had no intention of placing her foot on my chest!

 It was all over in seconds then and I woke up wearing a huge wrap round gadget resembling half a straight jacket!!

Ruth went off home as they decided to keep me in for the night (it is now almost midnight).

Nice bed in a corridor just outside the treatment room.



Only one disturbance during the night, when two gendarme’s arrived with a lad who looked to be the worse for drugs. They “handcuffed “  his arms to the cot sides of a bed and left!

In the morning, the young lad was sleepy and quiet, but two brawny chaps wheeled him and  his bed away into goodness knows where...certainly not outside!



I had a light breakfast...and Ruth collected me at about 10 am just in time to spruce up for the 14 July celebrations in the town.


Just to say I must have looked a fright arriving in the hospital wearing oldest shorts and oldest gardening shirt and two days beard!


The nurse who found me the bed also found a “wet wipe” face cloth of sorts and did a quick clean up of my knees before allowing me into the bed!  Just like being 5 all over again!



Oh yes, back in town that next morning;  we not only met the nurse’s grandmother....  but her mother as well.



Ends

RKS   July  2015

Sunday, 5 April 2015

MANY A SLIP..........

The trouble is that once you have slipped it seems to keep happening, and always on the same injured part!

For falling down steps etc.....we always have 'arnica' tablets handy..little white things in a tube.. they do work wonders for bashes and bangs, stop bruising and pain!! 

Coupled with 'arnica' gel to rub into the damaged area..fantastic results!

Just stretched my left thigh muscle and knee-joint again in garden falling over rough ground and bashing into wheelbarrow only four weeks after skidding on a puddle of mayonnaise that some idiot spilled on the floor at our communal lunch after church....that stretched my left leg into spasms of unbelievable hell!!


Annoying bit at the lunch was, that to stop falling completely, put my right hand out and straight into a pudding!!

It was almost better when......here we go again... been to chemist for 'arnica' reinforcements...some for home and more for camping car excursions!!

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Wednesday, 24 September 2014

Another eventful trip to France



Another.... eventful trip to France!

The car...a 1993 Escort 1600 ZETEC 16 valve convertible, my Mazda MX5!!
Time...September 2014

It happened at Kirton just outside Boston and only 20 miles or so into the return trip, first stage, to catch the 11pm ferry from Newhaven. I stopped to set up the gps gadget and Alan my passenger for the trip, proclaimed “Look at all that smoke coming from the bonnet!”
Quite quickly he continued, “look at all that smoke coming into the car!”

I must admit it look rather alarming and increasing quickly. I nipped out and without any regard for personal safety raised the bonnet. Yes, lots of smoke but certainly no flame!
Decision time...does one start serious lengthy investigation at the roadside...or does one slam the bonnet down and decide to travel sufficiently fast to keep the smoke out of the car? After all, the engine was still running fine if somewhat lumpy!

Slam the bonnet down won.... and we accelerated rapidly south.

An hour and a half later we stopped on a lay-by on the A14 just before joining the M11. No change....although did not allow the engine to idle and encourage that smoke. Didn’t lift the bonnet either, I am one of those old time types who believe “if you don’t want to know the answer....don’t ask the question!! I did look underneath though and there was no oil or water on the floor!

Food stop over, we took on the last leg of this UK bit and arrived at Newhaven in good time. After joining the traffic queues for the ferry we thought it prudent to cut the engine every time we moved up to the ticket kiosk just in case some bright spark on the ferry staff thought a car pouring oily smoke from the bonnet was not a good idea to put on the next ferry to France!

Finally on the ferry we found a suitable seat and crashed out for a rest and travel with someone else driving and no stress!!


Arriving in France at 4am, checked oil, only seemed normal usage, topped up a bit and decided to use motorway all the way at best possible speed!!

Arrived home close to Saumur half an hour before expected time and flaked out; slept two solid hours before appointment at local wine producer's "open day" and lunch with wine tasting!!


Car did really well, “new” second-hand tyres and wheels bought for the journey and everything else, ran superbly, except that dratted “tick over” sensor that failed 400 miles after leaving home and caused constant stalling at junctions and lights etc!!  Averaged 60 mph from Boston to Home!!

Alan greatly relieved to arrive here in France...at one stage I think he thought he was doomed to abandoning the blazing car somewhere on the side of a French motorway...but courage and confidence in one's machinery came out on top!!

Sunday, 19 January 2014

THE CAR THAT DID NOT WANT TO GO...............



THE CAR REALLY DID NOT WANT TO GO……………..

........be sold that is!

We have bought a new car, well new to us that is; it is a 1997 Peugeot 806 people carrier, except for us it is to carry dogs!
Two reasons for the change are that we would prefer a left hand drive, living in France permanently and secondly we have been looking for something with a gear change that suits Ruth and her short legs!
The short legs mean she has to push the driver’s seat right forward which leaves the gear “stick” virtually behind her in our aged “Passat”. This has caused her long term problems with her shoulder over a period of years.
So we thought to look for a buyer for the Passat. It is 20 years old now and we have had it for 14 of those years, so we know the car pretty well. It has only had just two owners!
It goes well, just been to UK and back, but it has a few noises and idiosyncrasies that we have just got used to!
We found a buyer by way of a site on the internet here in France... although I had not yet placed an advert. I explained that there were some things that would need doing if he wanted to test it again after its test runs out in March next and the chap duly arrived on the train the other day.
We have decided on a price of 200€ cash, which I think is very fair especially as I had put 50€ of diesel in just the other day.
 I collected him from the station and drove out of the town before handing over to the prospective buyer!
 Firstly he let the clutch out with a double jerk giving the engine and transmission a violent thump and activating a worn engine mounting with a clunk.
“The clutch is going”, he said positively.
I grinded my teeth and thought “oh no, another wally, who knows all about mechanics but has never had dirty hands”!
I told him that there was nothing at all wrong with the clutch, but yes there was a worn engine mount but it gave no trouble provided you drove “kindly” and did not ram the clutch in and out like a ...... I left the final words unsaid!
We continued towards my home where he was destined to leave me and proceed on his journey back north to wildest Brittany. He continued to pick spots off the car just as if he was buying something for 5000€ or even £.
200€ or even £ represents I think today something like 20€ or £ in the 1970’s when we were never paying more than £40 for our cars until the red Jaguar came along. Perhaps it is even less!
Just after passing thorough our village, I took him on the longer route to show him the road he would be taking home. We climbed a railway bridge and down the other side and quite suddenly the fuel gauge took a dive! This really gave my driver/buyer a grievance and he wasted no time in bringing my attention to this fact.
I was staggered, this had really never happened before and I could think of no reason for it.
“It must have been when we climbed that bridge that did it,” I said mystified.
I had already told the chap that he was in luck as I had put 50€ worth of fuel in the car only last week, to last me over Christmas!
His only comment was, “I might run out on the way home,” He had shut his ears to what I had told him previously, that he had enough fuel for about 400 miles.
We stopped at my home and he said he didn’t want the car, there was too much to do on it; but at the same time he had been talking on the way home about needing it to just drive around his vast fishing lake and collect rubbish. Why he would have to repair engine mounts and hypothetical clutches just to drive off road baffled me.
So he looked under the bonnet and I showed him the excellent spare wheel and all the tools complete etc.  “No”, he said it is too unreliable I might not get home!”

Ok I said you don’t have to buy it, I will take you straight back to the station; but first I must explain to my wife that we are going because she had fixed some food for you.
We duly parted and I zoomed him back to Saumur station and left him there. Whether he expected me to drop the price or something I just do not know, but I did manage to get in the fact that I now would be able to use all my own fuel.
 I also mentioned that I was retired and only received the minimum UK Old age pension of £100 per week so I was damned if I would let a perfectly reliable if elderly car with 10 gallons of fuel in, go for nothing!
He had been previously moaning at me on the phone for two days that he had difficulty getting to the station because he lived in a remote spot on his own,” so tough”, I thought as I dumped him at the station, he will just have to thumb a lift home after the train.

Oh, one more thing; there had been various English folk involved in the initial enquiry about the car. The first wanted one for nothing and another said it was for a friend etc.
 This “chap” who did come said he had a perfectly good Ford Focus back at home; hum, I thought afterwards, I think he was after buying it cheap and reselling it! Tough then, he was dropped off foodless and car less and train ticketless and all his own fault.
 I did not get round to telling him that I had been a second hand car salesman and HGV mechanic in my dim past! But I did tell him I knew the car backwards and would quite easily take it to the UK and back tomorrow if necessary, without any problems.
I think it was the old car who played up really, after being told it was not even fit to trail round a fishing lake in the mud for the rest of it life!

 POSTSCIPT........
The Passat has gone..... after the incident with the fishing lake man I put two good second-hand tyres on the front to keep it legal and advertised the car through the internet on a local information site for 300€ or near offer.
Had lots of enquiries but finally a client came last week, younger chap, quite pleasant whose father, sensible chap has been living here in France for over 20 years.
This client had a mate who is a Volkswagen mechanic and he quite happily paid us 280€ and drove the car back home a couple of hours away.
I reckon the mechanic friend had told him that this particular model of Passat was the best one that Volkswagen had ever made.
As I mentioned before, it had lots of noises that we had just got used to over the years but the build quality was superb...in over 20 years it never had the engine touched except for very regular oil and filter changes (5000 miles without fail). No components had needed changing, just drive belts and timing belts, it was even on the same clutch after almost 191,000 miles! So off it has gone to start a new life and I hope the new owner pops a cork of suitable sparkling wine, when it eventually hits 200,000miles! Oh, the car behaved impeccably on the test drive with its prospective new owner... it approved!
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Friday, 27 December 2013

IT'S CHRISTMAS EVE AND THERE IS A PROBLEM!



It’s Christmas Eve 2013 and something has happened.

There has been a bad storm come across the Atlantic Ocean and caused chaos in the UK just before the holiday period. It has been pretty rough here too with very strong gale force winds and very heavy rain.

We were happily watching the problems in the UK on the Daily Telegraph web site when all of a sudden the internet ceased to function on my computer.
On setting out to see if the neighbours had a telephone service I noticed our telephone wire running from the supply pole close to the house had been re-routed around the sharp edge of a new electricity.... well it’s not really a pole, rather a junior pylon that has been erected during a planned replacement programme of electricity service in our area.
This junior pylon is right next to where its predecessor was located but just a bit nearer to our roadway. Consequently and maddeningly previously unnoticed by myself, this new junior pylon is in direct line between the spindly wooden telephone supply pole and our house. Our and only our, telephone wire has to negotiate this super new mini pylon and its even newer sharp cement edges. Even more maddeningly, the gales of last night and today have happily rubbed the said wire up and down the sharp cement surface sufficient now, to stop our phone working.
Of course like many maddening things, it is a bank holiday tomorrow, Christmas Day, and the nice lady at our telephone company I spoke to, from our neighbour's phone (all working nicely, thank you,) did say that she would report the problem straight away but it would take two or three working days to fix!
I’m just thankful that I live in France as Thursday is “Boxing Day”,  here it isn’t, it’s just another “working day”; working day one! Friday is working day two, so depending on how much other storm damage there is to fix we could be in with a chance of being back on line by the week end........ if we were still in the UK, when are the next “working days” after Christmas Day?
They could be the 2nd or even 3rd of January!
Mind you, there is another alternative, while Ruth is looking the other way I could just get my extension ladders out and splice it myself, tomorrow...!
Postscript:
We were out visiting friends for lunch on Thursday (26 Dec), on returning we could see our phone was fixed. A bright shiny metal band had been mounted on the junior pylon and our phone line duly attached to that...all clear and working...
Within 1 working day....cheers France Telecom!
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